I can’t believe we’re already three-quarters of the way through our training year. It feels like just yesterday our new coaches walked into the room in Natomas—maybe a little nervous, definitely very curious, and everyone full of possibility. And now here we are: deep in the work, deep in the learning, and deep in the transformation. Weekend 9 was a rich one.
We concluded our exploration of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) with a dive into the presuppositions that form its philosophical foundation. Some of these concepts can seem a little abstract at first—but when we allow ourselves to sit with them, they begin to open doors. For our coaches, I saw those doors creaking open.
Take this one – “There is no failure, only feedback.” This one always lands differently once you start applying it to your own life. And applying it to one’s own life is imperative if we are to adopt this framework as coaches with our clients. As we talked through it, I saw and heard the shifts happening as students began to see the effect that labeling something as a “failure” has – how it creates a dead end; whereas considering our results as feedback to see what we may need or want to change going forward, opens so much more possibility to get a different result in the future. When we adopt this lens, the energy also starts to shift from self-criticism and even shame to curiosity and action. It’s powerful.
Another that always resonates: “People are whole, complete, and work perfectly.” It’s such a radical reframe in a world that often insists we’re broken. But as coaches, this presupposition changes everything. It’s not our job to fix people—it’s our job to trust their inner wisdom, to listen deeply, and to walk alongside them as they reconnect with their own resourcefulness. And yes, that includes ourselves, too.
Then, of course, “The map is not the territory.” A reminder that none of us sees the world as it is—we see it as we are. Each of us walks around with a personal map, drawn from our experiences, beliefs, and meaning-making. No wonder we get lost from time to time. In coaching, we get to gently inquire into those maps—what’s on them, what’s missing, and what might be ready for revision.
Our final NLP tool was using metaphors in coaching. We looked at how metaphors can bypass the intellect and speak directly to the heart. Whether it’s stepping onto a bridge, carrying a heavy backpack, or planting a seed, a good metaphor does more than describe—it moves. It is a way to create deep realization in clients without having to intellectually examine the details of the situation.
And finally, we took a big step into group coaching this weekend. There’s something uniquely transformative about doing this work in community. One person speaks, but the learning echoes through the whole group. Our practice demonstrated that group wisdom is every bit as powerful (and sometimes more) than individual. Sometimes the biggest insights come from witnessing, resonating, and reflecting together. We are reminded that, “a rising tide lifts all boats.”
Weekend 9 covered a lot of ground. Because our students have been in this work for nine months now, they are adept coaches. Every time we meet, I’m reminded why I love this work—and why I’m so grateful to be on this path with all of our coaches.
