Whenever I come into spin class, there’s a song playing – often a fairly motivating song. I blog a lot about spin class because it is challenging for me and it hits me frequently that this is what makes it work for me. Because life is challenging as well and often in similar ways. If I can learn from this metaphoric example of something that doesn’t seem to matter much in the grand scheme of things (i.e., going to exercise), this translates over for me into how I might live my life, move through the challenges, reach for and get what I want – as a small business owner, as a coach, as a parent, as a person.
The song playing when I walked is called “Dreams” and is by Life of Dillon (I looked it up). There is a line in the song that jumped out at me: “If your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough.” If you are interested, here is the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFxGlYVP8xU
We all have dreams, whether we call them that or not. We want a new house or a better relationship or to start a new business or maybe learn to surf. We all have dreams but we limit ourselves – sometimes unconsciously and sometimes consciously. Consciously we might say, “That’s too big for me to get.” Unconsciously we might just stop dreaming. Unconsciously we might choose not to go in a direction that is good for us because it feels so uncomfortable. Unconsciously, we might just want the things that are smaller, easier and within reach.
What I have learned from working for many years with people who are stretching themselves and are reaching for something they didn’t have already is that there is only one way to live – I mean live – your life. And that is to reach; to stretch; to go for that thing that you want but you think you can’t have. In coach training, we called it the “big gulp test.” My mentor coach used to say to me, “If it doesn’t make you want to throw up, it’s not really worth pursuing.”
Most of my dreams make me feel scared. And make me feel that “big gulp.” So I know I am on track.
My challenge to you today is to look around and ask, “am I still dreaming?” “what are my dreams?” “are they big enough?” “do they scare me?” And if not, my challenge to you is to find something you want that makes you nervous, even a little bit nervous. You can start small if you are not in the habit of dreaming and stretching. Start small and decide to go get it. Maybe it’s asking for a promotion. Maybe it’s asking that person out. Maybe it’s calling that person you haven’t talked to in a year because you had a falling out. Maybe it’s contacting that potential client. Maybe it’s training for a 1/2 marathon. What is that thing that you want that you’re afraid to want?
Stop playing it small or safe. Because if your dreams don’t scare you, they’re probably not big enough.
(Thank you to Team Ride in Sacramento. I am guessing this project – a unique spin studio was a big gulp dream at one point.)
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And if you are in Sacramento on November 4, 2015, register for our 1/2 day training on “nuts and bolts of communication.” Click the link for more information: http://www.mclarencoaching.com/coaching-for-businesses-and-corporations/workshops-and-trainings/
Learn how to speak clearly, listen well and cut through the interpretations that lead to miscommunication.