Have you ever had this experience: You run into a co-worker in the hall at 11am and you say, “How are you?” She says, “Man, this day is terrible.” Or, “I am having the worst day.”
I hear this a lot. Or on Tuesday, “This is the worst week ever.”
I had heard this a few times before I started thinking, “but the day has just started; the week has just started. How do you know it is the worst day/week ever?”
And I realized this is a lot like declaring HOW your day or week is GOING to be.
We work with declarative statements in coaching. My clients practice making clear statements of what they want. They say things like: “I am gonna land this client.” Or “I am going to talk to my boss and get a raise.” It’s not positive thinking so much as intention-setting. Some people tell me this is hard to say. To declare what they intend to do or have.
And yet, these same people are very willing to declare they are about to have the worst day of their life.
It’s funny isn’t it? We all do it.
The purpose of this blog is to bring this practice to awareness. And then to offer you an interruption. When you hear yourself say, “This is the worst day,” and it’s only 11am, STOP. There is no reason the energy of a day has to go from the time you get up until the time you go to bed. Any more than the energy of a week must go from Monday to Friday. It may seem that way, but it is all made up. It’s great to set a New Year’s Resolution, or declaration on January 1. But you can also set it on March 24. Or you can set it on January 1, forget about it on January 15, and declare it again on January 29. Once you know this and practice it, you will get better at those New Year’s resolutions. Because dropping off on January 15 does not mean you have ruined the whole year. Just start again.
Once you realize that segments of time are whatever you want them to be, you are in control. So at 11am you can answer this way, “You know, my morning has not been great, but I am gonna have an amazing afternoon and evening.” And then listen to yourself. And then do it. You get to choose.